My Vaio lappy was in the hospital =(

I wont be blogging this few days due to my lappy was in the hospital. My graphic card was burn and need to replace it with a new card, so no other choice but send to the service center. Now i'm using my old laptop which was kinda sux. And due to my HP lappy video card was down too, i can be able to on my comp for certain limit of times only. After that i cant be able to use for days because it will give me 3 long beep and 2 short beep error sound when i start my HP laptop.

I finally make a final decision 2 days ago. Guess this is the right decision for me. I know it's too sudden but i have no other choice! Been really down this past few days, but no matter wat happen, i believe that i can still overcome it! I just need to back to my normal routine that i had been last time. For those who know me well sure know what is my routine. I know back to that routine was kinda..erm..crazy? LOL!

Nowadays, alot of people really concern me alot..i can see and feel that. My two sister keep showing me that they care of me no matter what. Because this few days, i keep close myself in the bedroom after i'm back from outside..Den both of my sister will gently knock on my door and enter the room, sit beside me and asked me whether i'm ok? I know i'm hot temper when they asked me softly, but i just cant be able to control it, but they understand my feeling..they never scolded me when i vent my anger on them or showing my attitude..they juz telling me softly that they will wait for me to tell them about my problem if i feel the time is right to tell them. Both my jie..thanks =D

Now my blood becoming very cold..haha..Actually i dont mind to be a cold hearted guy as been a cold hearted guy wont hurt myself =D

I really hate the feeling of been alone..But guess its fated that i need to be alone. No matter how hard i tried, the final answer will ended up with disappointment. And i notice..been a good guy will really ended up get nothing in return, so what for been such a good guy? Been a bad guy will be the best..

This few days, i notice i really neglect my brotherhood alot..I really very sorry abt that..i wont blame u all guys if you all angry with me, as i know..not worth to forgive me..and i also wont ask for forgiveness. I know u all may look fine in front of me..or u all forgive me..but deep in my heart, i juz cant be able to forgive myself..

Think i'm back to 4 to 5 years ago.. Whatever things happen..i will need to face it all alone..cried alone when i faced something that i cant be able to solved. Vent anger on the wall or some other stranger..I deserve it..

I swear..i wont trust other so easily..

Take care..